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September 25, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Thursday, Pope Francis told Congress that the United States should reject a “mindset of hostility” towards immigrants. And, keep in mind, the Pope said this after visiting D.C. and New York, he...
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October 27, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Monday, the World Health Organization said that eating processed meats like sausage or bacon can lead to bowel cancer in humans. The WHO then went on to say that Santa isn’t real, there’s no such...
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August 31, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. According to a new study, women are as obsessed with breasts as men. Which means 100% of the population have no idea what color Kate Upton’s eyes are. 2. The movie “Southside With You,” which tells...
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October 14, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. At a rally on Tuesday, Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump mistakenly encouraged his supporters to get out and vote on November 28th, instead of the correct day for the general election,...
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December 15, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. Late Tuesday night actor Alan Thicke, best known for playing father Jason Seaver on “Growing Pains,” died at the age of 69. Hey, God, you took the wrong beloved TV dad from the 80s: 2. A spokesman...
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February 27, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. During his speech on Friday, President Trump called for an end to the media’s use of unnamed sources. But, in the media’s defense, sometimes things do a lot worse when you attach a name to them: 2....
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April 13, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. In a new interview, President Trump appeared to waiver in his support for his chief strategist Steve Bannon. Which can only mean on thing, Trump has met a younger, hotter morbidly obese anti-semite...
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June 20, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. Senator Marco Rubio on Sunday rejected calls to shut down the Russia probe and urged President Trump to embrace a full investigation. Although, that’s not the first time people have urged President...
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July 12, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. According to a new study, happy cows produce more milk. And, if they’re really happy, that ain’t milk. 2. In a recent interview, former late-night host David Letterman said that people need to “stop...
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July 27, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. Energy Secretary Rick Perry reportedly took part in a 22-minute phone call with a Russian prankster who he thought was the Prime Minister of Ukraine. Said Perry, “Dammit, I knew ‘Ukraine’ sounded...
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