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June 13, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. This coming Sunday is Fathers’ Day and, to save time, this year Hallmark has come out with a line of greeting cards specifically addressed to Kevin Federline. 2. Four strippers in New York were...
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June 20, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. In an interview on Wednesday, Texas Governor Rick Perry stood by his recent comments in which he compared homosexuality to alcoholism. Perry further explained the similarities between the two by...
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July 14, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Friday, NBA superstar LeBron James decided to leave the Miami Heat and return to play for his hometown Cleveland Cavaliers. I feel like Heat fans aren’t going to take the news well when they show...
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October 2, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Wednesday, Texas Governor Rick Perry said some school-age children may have come in contact with the first person diagnosed with Ebola in the U.S. So lets just hope, like Perry was in his school...
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December 12, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. In a recent interview, Kim Kardashian said she gained weight during her pregnancy because God was punishing her for being so hot. Said God, “Dealing with Kanye should be punishment enough. You got...
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December 16, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. Cuba Gooding Jr. has been cast as O.J. Simpson in an upcoming television miniseries. Nicole Brown Simpson, the woman O.J. allegedly murdered, will be played by Gooding’s career. 2. Yesterday,...
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January 30, 2015 -Monologue Jokes
1. According to controversial new regulations, female athletes with as much testosterone in their blood as some men are not allowed to compete in women’s sporting events. Said one WNBA fan, “Those were...
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May 21, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. New Jersey Governor Chris Christie has reversed course and now says he no longer supports a pathway to citizenship for undocumented aliens. And people around Christie new he was reversing his...
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June 5, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. According to sources, Jeb Bush will announce his bid for the Republican presidential nomination on June 15 in Miami. So now, once again, John Travolta’s sexuality is the world’s worst kept secret....
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June 15, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. The mother of Rachel Dolezal, the head of Spokane, Washington’s chapter of the NAACP, claims that her daughter is lying about being black, noting that Rachel’s Montana birth certificate says she was...
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June 22, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. Rachel Dolezal, the former president of Spokane’s chapter of the NAACP, is reportedly in talks to star in her own reality TV show. It will air on the BET? Network. 2. Rick Perry, the former Texas...
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July 3, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. The Oklahoma Supreme Court ruled Tuesday that the state must remove a granite monument of the Ten Commandments from the lawn of its capitol building. Said one state senator, “Looks like my...
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July 17, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Thursday, TLC officially cancelled “19 Kids and Counting,” nearly two months after revelations about acts of child molestation committed by Josh Duggar, one of the kids, when he was a teenager....
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July 24, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton on Thursday said a two-state solution for Israel and the Palestinians was the only resolution to the conflict there. Hillary said she got the idea...
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August 6, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. Tonight is the first Republican presidential debate. Unsurprisingly, Donald Trump has already declared himself the winner. 2. Unfortunately former Texas Governor Rick Perry will not participate in...
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August 7, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. Yesterday, the National Weather Service predicted a below-average 2015 hurricane season. So George W. Bush will just have to find a new way to not care about black people. 2. Actors Jennifer Aniston...
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August 17, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Saturday, Disney announced the creation of two massive Star Wars expansions at its Disneyland and Disney World resorts. Said Star Wars fans, “Can we get a kid’s rate if we still live in our...
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September 2, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. CNN is amending the criteria for its upcoming Republican presidential debate, possibly opening the door for Carly Florin to join the top-tier candidates on stage. “That’s great news,” said Donald...
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September 14, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. Republican front-runner Donald Trump said on Sunday, high salaries paid to CEOs were a “joke” and were often approved by company boards stacked with the CEO’s friends. Just a reminder, this is...
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September 18, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. Matt Damon has apologized after sparking an uproar in the season premiere of HBO’s “Project Greenlight,” which he produces with Ben Affleck, by explaining diversity in film to a black woman...
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